little novels- 第11部分

She　had　evidently　something　special　to　say　to　me；　and　she　had　adopted　the　necessary　measures　for　keeping　the　children　in　front　of　us；　well　out　of　hearing。　Freddy　led　the　way　on　his　horse　on　three　wheels；　the　girls　followed；　skipping　merrily。　Mrs。　Fosdyke　opened　the　business　by　the　most　embarrassing　remark　that　she　could　possibly　have　made　under　the　circumstances。

〃I　find　that　you　are　acquainted　with　Mr。　Sax；〃　she　began；　〃and　I　am　surprised　to　hear　that　you　dislike　him。〃

She　smiled　pleasantly；　as　if　my　supposed　dislike　of　Mr。　Sax　rather　amused　her。　What　〃the　ruling　passion〃　may　be　among　men；　I　cannot　presume　to　consider。　My　own　sex；　however；　I　may　claim　to　understand。　The　ruling　passion　among　women　is　Conceit。　My　ridiculous　notion　of　my　own　consequence　was　wounded　in　some　way。　I　assumed　a　position　of　the　loftiest　indifference。

〃Really；　ma'am；〃　I　said；　〃I　can't　undertake　to　answer　for　any　impression　that　Mr。　Sax　may　have　formed。　We　met　by　the　merest　accident。　I　know　nothing　about　him。〃

Mrs。　Fosdyke　eyed　me　slyly；　and　appeared　to　be　more　amused　than　ever。

〃He　is　a　very　odd　man；〃　she　admitted；　〃but　I　can　tell　you　there　is　a　fine　nature　under　that　strange　surface　of　his。　However；〃　she　went　on；　〃I　am　forgetting　that　he　forbids　me　to　talk　about　him　in　your　presence。　When　the　opportunity　offers；　I　shall　take　my　own　way　of　teaching　you　two　to　understand　each　other：　you　will　both　be　grateful　to　me　when　I　have　succeeded。　In　the　meantime；　there　is　a　third　person　who　will　be　sadly　disappointed　to　hear　that　you　know　nothing　about　Mr。　Sax。〃

〃May　I　ask；　ma'am；　who　the　person　is？〃

〃Can　you　keep　a　secret；　Miss　Morris？　Of　course　you　can！　The　person　is　Miss　Melbury。〃

（Miss　Melbury　was　a　dark　woman。　It　cannot　be　because　I　am　a　fair　woman　myselfI　hope　I　am　above　such　narrow　prejudices　as　thatbut　it　is　certainly　true　that　I　don't　admire　dark　women。）

〃She　heard　Mr。　Sax　telling　me　that　you　particularly　disliked　him；　〃　Mrs。　Fosdyke　proceeded。　〃And　just　as　you　appeared　in　the　hall；　she　was　asking　me　to　find　out　what　your　reason　was。　My　own　opinion　of　Mr。　Sax；　I　ought　to　tell　you；　doesn't　satisfy　her；　I　am　his　old　friend；　and　I　present　him　of　course　from　my　own　favorable　point　of　view。　Miss　Melbury　is　anxious　to　be　made　acquainted　with　his　faultsand　she　expected　you　to　be　a　valuable　witness　against　him。〃

Thus　far　we　had　been　walking　on。　We　now　stopped；　as　if　by　common　consent；　and　looked　at　one　another。

In　my　previous　experience　of　Mrs。　Fosdyke；　I　had　only　seen　the　more　constrained　and　formal　side　of　her　character。　Without　being　aware　of　my　own　success；　I　had　won　the　mother's　heart　in　winning　the　goodwill　of　her　children。　Constraint　now　seized　its　first　opportunity　of　melting　away；　the　latent　sense　of　humor　in　the　great　lady　showed　itself；　while　I　was　inwardly　wondering　what　the　nature　of　Miss　Melbury's　extraordinary　interest　in　Mr。　Sax　might　be。　Easily　penetrating　my　thoughts；　she　satisfied　my　curiosity　without　committing　herself　to　a　reply　in　words。　Her　large　gray　eyes　sparkled　as　they　rested　on　my　face；　and　she　hummed　the　tune　of　the　old　French　song；　_〃C'est　l'amour；　l'amour；　l'amour！〃_　There　is　no　disguising　itsomething　in　this　disclosure　made　me　excessively　angry。　Was　I　angry　with　Miss　Melbury？　or　with　Mr。　Sax？　or　with　myself？　I　think　it　must　have　been　with　myself。

Finding　that　I　had　nothing　to　say　on　my　side；　Mrs。　Fosdyke　looked　at　her　watch；　and　remembered　her　domestic　duties。　To　my　relief；　our　interview　came　to　an　end。

〃I　have　a　dinner…party　to…day；〃　she　said；　〃and　I　have　not　seen　the　housekeeper　yet。　Make　yourself　beautiful；　Miss　Morris；　and　join　us　in　the　drawing…room　after　dinner。〃

V。

I　WORE　my　best　dress；　and；　in　all　my　life　before；　I　never　took　such　pains　with　my　hair。　Nobody　will　be　foolish　enough；　I　hope；　to　suppose　that　I　did　this　on　Mr。　Sax's　account。　How　could　I　possibly　care　about　a　man　who　was　little　better　than　a　stranger　to　me？　No！　the　person　I　dressed　at　was　Miss　Melbury。

She　gave　me　a　look；　as　I　modestly　placed　myself　in　a　corner；　which　amply　rewarded　me　for　the　time　spent　on　my　toilet。　The　gentlemen　came　in。　I　looked　at　Mr。　Sax　（mere　curiosity）　under　shelter　of　my　fan。　His　appearance　was　greatly　improved　by　evening　dress。　He　discovered　me　in　my　corner；　and　seemed　doubtful　whether　to　approach　me　or　not。　I　was　reminded　of　our　first　odd　meeting；　and　I　could　not　help　smiling　as　I　called　it　to　mind。　Did　he　presume　to　think　that　I　was　encouraging　him？　Before　I　could　decide　that　question；　he　took　the　vacant　place　on　the　sofa。　In　any　other　manafter　what　had　passed　in　the　morningthis　would　have　been　an　audacious　proceeding。　_He_　looked　so　painfully　embarrassed；　that　i　t　became　a　species　of　Christian　duty　to　pity　him。

〃Won't　you　shake　hands？〃　he　said；　just　as　he　had　said　it　at　Sandwich。

I　peeped　round　the　corner　of　my　fan　at　Miss　Melbury。　She　was　looking　at　us。　I　shook　hands　with　Mr。　Sax。

〃What　sort　of　sensation　is　it；〃　he　asked；　〃when　you　shake　hands　with　a　man　whom　you　hate？〃

〃I　really　can't　tell　you；〃　I　answered　innocently；　〃I　have　never　done　such　a　thing。〃

〃You　would　not　lunch　with　me　at　Sandwich；〃　he　protested；　〃and；　after　the　humblest　apology　on　my　part；　you　won't　forgive　me　for　what　I　did　this　morning。　Do　you　expect　me　to　believe　that　I　am　not　the　special　object　of　your　antipathy？　I　wish　I　had　never　met　with　you！　At　my　age；　a　man　gets　angry　when　he　is　treated　cruelly　and　doesn't　deserve　it。　You　don't　understand　that；　I　dare　say。〃

〃Oh；　yes；　I　do。　I　heard　what　you　said　about　me　to　Mrs。　Fosdyke；　and　I　heard　you　bang　the　door　when　you　got　out　of　my　way。〃

He　received　this　reply　with　every　appearance　of　satisfaction。　〃So　you　listened；　did　you？　I'm　glad　to　hear　that。〃

〃Why？〃

〃It　shows　you　take　some　interest　in　me；　after　all。〃

Throughout　this　frivolous　talk　（I　only　venture　to　report　it　because　it　shows　that　I　bore　no　malice　on　my　side）　Miss　Melbury　was　looking　at　us　like　the　basilisk　of　the　ancients。　She　owned　to　being　on　the　wrong　side　of　thirty；　and　she　had　a　little　moneybut　these　were　surely　no　reasons　why　she　should　glare　at　a　poor　governess。　Had　some　secret　understanding　of　the　tender　sort　been　already　established　between　Mr。　Sax　and　herself？　She　provoked　me　into　trying　to　find　outespecially　as　the　last　words　he　had　said　offered　me　the　opportunity。

〃I　can　prove　that　I　feel　a　sincere　interest　in　you；〃　I　resumed。　〃I　can　resign　you　to　a　lady　who　has　a　far　better　claim　to　your　attention　than　mine。　You　are　neglecting　her　shamefully。〃

He　stared　at　me　with　an　appearance　of　bewilderment；　which　seemed　to　imply　that　the　attachment　was　on　the　lady's　side；　so　far。　It　was　of　course　impossible　to　mention　names；　I　merely　turned　my　eyes　in　the　right　direction。　He　looked　where　I　lookedand　his　shyness　revealed　itself；　in　spite　of　his　resolution　to　conceal　it。　His　face　flushed；　he　looked　mortified　and　surprised。　Miss　Melbury　could　endure　it　no　longer。　She　rose；　took　a　song　from　the　music…stand；　and　approached　us。

〃I　am　going　to　sing；〃　she　said；　handing　the　music　to　him。　〃Please　turn　over　for　me；　Mr。　Sax。〃

I　think　he　hesitatedbut　I　cannot　feel　sure　that　I　observed　him　correctly。　It　matters　little。　With　or　without　hesitation；　he　followed　her　to　the　piano。

Miss　Melbury　sangwith　perfect　self…possession；　and　an　immense　compass　of　voice。　A　gentleman　near　me　said　she　ought　to　be　on　the　stage。　I　thought　so　too。　Big　as　it　was；　our　drawing…room　was　not　large　enough　for　her。　The　gentleman　sang　next。　No　voice　at　allbut　so　sweet；　such　true　feeling！　I　turned　over　the　leaves　for　him。　A　dear　old　lady；　sitting　near　the　piano；　entered　into　conversation　with　me。　She　spoke　of　the　great　singers　at　the　beginning　of　the　present　century。　Mr。　Sax　hovered　about；　with　Miss　Melbury's　eye　on　him。　I　was　so　entranced　by　the　anecdotes　of　my　venerable　friend；　that　I　could　take　no　notice　of　Mr。　Sax。　Later；　when　the　dinner…party　was　over；　and　we　were　retiring　for　the　night；　he　still　hovered　about；　and　ended　in　offering　me　a　bedroom　candle。　I　immediately　handed　it　to　Miss　Melbury。　Really　a　most　enjoyable　evening！

VI。

THE　next　morning　we　were　startled　by　an　extraordinary　proceeding　on　the　part　of　one　of　the　guests。　Mr。　Sax　had　left　Carsham　Hall　by　the　first　trainnobody　knew　why。

Nature　has　laidso；　at　least；　philosophers　saysome　heavy　burdens　upon　women。　Do　those　learned　persons　include　in　their　list　the　burden　of　hysterics？　If　so；　I　cordially　agree　with　them。　It　is　hardly　worth　speaking　of　in　my　casea　constitutional　outbreak　in　the　solitude　of　my　own　room；　treated　with　eau…de…cologne　and　water；　and　quite　forgotten　afterward　in　the　absorbing　employment　of　education。　My　favorite　pupil；　Freddy；　had　been　up　earlier　than　the　rest　of　usbreathing　the　morning　air　in　the　fruit…garden。　He　had　seen　Mr。　Sax　and　had　asked　him　when　he　was　coming　back　again。　And　Mr。　Sax　had　said；　〃I　shall　be　back　again　next　month。〃　（Dear　little　Freddy！）

In　the　meanwhile　we；　in　the　schoolroom；　had　the　prospect　before　us　of　a　dull　time　in　an　empty　house。　The　remaining　guests　were　to　go　away　at　the　end　of　the　week；　their　hostess　being　engaged　to　pay　a　visit　to　some　old　friends　in　Scotland。

During　the　next　three　or　four　days；　though　I　was　often　alone　with　Mrs。　Fosdyke；　she　never　said　one　word　on　the　subject　of　Mr。　Sax。　Once　or　twice　I　caught　her　looking　at　me　with　that　unendurably　significant　smile　of　hers。　Miss　Melbury　was　equally　unpleasant　in　another　way。　When　we　accidentally　met　on　the　stairs；　her　black　eyes　shot　at　me　passing　glances　of　hatred　and　scorn。　Did　these　two　ladies　presume　to　think？

No；　I　abstained　from　completing　that　inquiry　at　the　time；　and　I　abstain　from　completing　it　here。

The　end　of　the　week　came；　and　I　and　the　children　were　left　alone　at　Carsham　Hall。

I　took　advantage　of　the　leisure　hours　at　my　disposal　to　write　to　Sir　Gervase；　respectfully　inquiring　after　his　health；　and　informing　him　that　I　had　been　again　most　fortunate　in　my　engagement　as　a　governess。　By　return　of　post　an　answer　arrived。　I　eagerly　opened　it。　The　first　lines　informed　me　of　Sir　Gervase　Damian's　death。

The　letter　dropped　from　my　hand。　I　looked　at　my　little　enameled　cross。　It　is　not　for　me　to　say　what　I　felt。　Think　of　all　that　I　owed　to　him；　and　remember　how　lonely　my　lot　was　in　the　world。　I　gave　the　children　a　holiday；　it　was　only　th