through life in perfect ease and good…humour。 The
hottest suns of India never heated his temper； and the
Walcheren ague never shook it。 He walked up to a battery
with just as much indifference as to a dinner…table； had
dined on horse…flesh and turtle with equal relish and
appetite； and had an old mother； Mrs。 O'Dowd of
O'Dowdstown indeed； whom he had never disobeyed
but when he ran away and enlisted； and when he persisted
in marrying that odious Peggy Malony。
Peggy was one of five sisters； and eleven children of the
noble house of Glenmalony； but her husband； though her
own cousin； was of the mother's side； and so had not the
inestimable advantage of being allied to the Malonys；
whom she believed to be the most famous family in the
world。 Having tried nine seasons at Dublin and two at
Bath and Cheltenham； and not finding a partner for life；
Miss Malony ordered her cousin Mick to marry her when
she was about thirty…three years of age； and the honest
fellow obeying； carried her off to the West Indies； to
preside over the ladies of the th regiment； into which he
had just exchanged。
Before Mrs。 O'Dowd was half an hour in Amelia's （or
indeed in anybody else's） company； this amiable lady told
all her birth and pedigree to her new friend。 〃My dear；〃
said she； good…naturedly； 〃it was my intention that Garge
should be a brother of my own； and my sister Glorvina
would have suited him entirely。 But as bygones are
bygones； and he was engaged to yourself； why； I'm
determined to take you as a sister instead； and to look upon
you as such； and to love you as one of the family。 Faith；
you've got such a nice good…natured face and way widg
you； that I'm sure we'll agree； and that you'll be an
addition to our family anyway。〃
〃'Deed and she will；〃 said O'Dowd； with an approving
air； and Amelia felt herself not a little amused and
grateful to be thus suddenly introduced to so large a
party of relations。
〃We're all good fellows here；〃 the Major's lady continued。
〃There's not a regiment in the service where you'll
find a more united society nor a more agreeable mess…
room。 There's no quarrelling； bickering； slandthering； nor
small talk amongst us。 We all love each other。〃
〃Especially Mrs。 Magenis；〃 said George； laughing。
〃Mrs。 Captain Magenis and me has made up； though
her treatment of me would bring me gray hairs with
sorrow to the grave。〃
〃And you with such a beautiful front of black； Peggy；
my dear；〃 the Major cried。
〃Hould your tongue； Mick； you booby。 Them husbands
are always in the way； Mrs。 Osborne； my dear； and as
for my Mick； I often tell him he should never open his
mouth but to give the word of command； or to put meat
and drink into it。 I'll tell you about the regiment； and
warn you when we're alone。 Introduce me to your brother
now； sure he's a mighty fine man； and reminds me of me
cousin； Dan Malony （Malony of Ballymalony； my dear；
you know who mar'ied Ophalia Scully； of Oystherstown；
own cousin to Lord Poldoody）。 Mr。 Sedley； sir； I'm
deloighted to be made known te ye。 I suppose you'll dine
at the mess to…day。 （Mind that divvle of a docther； Mick；
and whatever ye du； keep yourself sober for me party
this evening。）〃
〃It's the 150th gives us a farewell dinner； my love；〃
interposed the Major； 〃but we'll easy get a card for Mr。
Sedley。〃
〃Run Simple （Ensign Simple； of Ours； my dear Amelia。
I forgot to introjuice him to ye）。 Run in a hurry； with
Mrs。 Major O'Dowd's compliments to Colonel Tavish；
and Captain Osborne has brought his brothernlaw down；
and will bring him to the 150th mess at five o'clock sharp
when you and I； my dear； will take a snack here； if you
like。〃 Before Mrs。 O'Dowd's speech was concluded； the
young Ensign was trotting downstairs on his commission。
〃Obedience is the soul of the army。 We will go to our
duty while Mrs。 O'Dowd will stay and enlighten you；
Emmy；〃 Captain Osborne said； and the two gentlemen；
taking each a wing of the Major； walked out with that
officer； grinning at each other over his head。
And； now having her new friend to herself； the impetuous
Mrs： O'Dowd proceeded to pour out such a
quantity of information as no poor little woman's memory
could ever tax itself to bear。 She told Amelia a thousand
particulars relative to the very numerous family of which
the amazed young lady found herself a member。 〃Mrs。
Heavytop； the Colonel's wife； died in Jamaica of the
yellow faver and a broken heart comboined； for the horrud
old Colonel； with a head as bald as a cannon…ball； was
making sheep's eyes at a half…caste girl there。 Mrs。
Magenis； though without education； was a good woman；
but she had the divvle's tongue； and would cheat her own
mother at whist。 Mrs。 Captain Kirk must turn up her
lobster eyes forsooth at the idea of an honest round game
（wherein me fawther； as pious a man as ever went to
church； me uncle Dane Malony； and our cousin the
Bishop； took a hand at loo； or whist； every night of their
lives）。 Nayther of 'em's goin' with the regiment this time；〃
Mrs。 O'Dowd added。 〃Fanny Magenis stops with her
mother； who sells small coal and potatoes； most likely；
in Islington…town； hard by London； though she's always
bragging of her father's ships； and pointing them out to us
as they go up the river： and Mrs。 Kirk and her children
will stop here in Bethesda Place； to be nigh to her favourite
preacher； Dr。 Ramshorn。 Mrs。 Bunny's in an interesting
situationfaith； and she always is； thenand has
given the Lieutenant seven already。 And Ensign Posky's
wife； who joined two months before you； my dear； has
quarl'd with Tom Posky a score of times； till you can
hear'm all over the bar'ck （they say they're come to
broken pleets； and Tom never accounted for his black oi）；
and she'll go back to her mother； who keeps a ladies'
siminary at Richmondbad luck to her for running away
from it！ Where did ye get your finishing； my dear？ I had
moin； and no expince spared； at Madame Flanahan's； at
Ilyssus Grove； Booterstown； near Dublin； wid a Marchioness
to teach us the true Parisian pronunciation； and a retired
Mejor…General of the French service to put us
through the exercise。〃
Of this incongruous family our astonished Amelia found
herself all of a sudden a member： with Mrs。 O'Dowd as
an elder sister。 She was presented to her other female
relations at tea…time； on whom； as she was quiet； good…
natured； and not too handsome； she made rather an
agreeable impression until the arrival of the gentlemen from
the mess of the 150th； who all admired her so； that her
sisters began； of course； to find fault with her。
〃I hope Osborne has sown his wild oats；〃 said Mrs。
Magenis to Mrs。 Bunny。 〃If a reformed rake makes a
good husband； sure it's she will have the fine chance with
Garge；〃 Mrs。 O'Dowd remarked to Posky； who had lost
her position as bride in the regiment； and was quite angry
with the usurper。 And as for Mrs。 Kirk： that disciple of
Dr。 Ramshorn put one or two leading professional
questions to Amelia； to see whether she was awakened；
whether she was a professing Christian and so forth； and
finding from the simplicity of Mrs。 Osborne's replies that
she was yet in utter darkness； put into her hands three
little penny books with pictures； viz。； the 〃Howling
Wilderness；〃 the 〃Washerwoman of Wandsworth Common；〃
and the 〃British Soldier's best Bayonet；〃 which； bent upon
awakening her before she slept； Mrs。 Kirk begged Amelia
to read that night ere she went to bed。
But all the men； like good fellows as they were； rallied
round their comrade's pretty wife； and paid her their
court with soldierly gallantry。 She had a little triumph；
which flushed her spirits and made her eyes sparkle。
George was proud of her popularity； and pleased with the
manner （which was very gay and graceful； though naive
and a little timid） with which she received the gentlemen's
attentions； and answered their compliments。 And
he in his uniformhow much handsomer he was than
any man in the room！ She felt that he was affectionately
watching her； and glowed with pleasure at his kindness。 〃I
will make all his friends welcome；〃 she resolved in her
heart。 〃I will love all as I love him。 I will always try and
be gay and good…humoured and make his home happy。〃
The regiment indeed adopted her with acclamation。
The Captains approved； the Lieutenants applauded； the
Ensigns admired。 Old Cutler； the Doctor； made one or
two jokes； which； being professional； need not be repeated；
and Cackle； the Assistant M。D。 of Edinburgh； condescended
to examine her upon leeterature； and tried her
with his three best French quotations。 Young Stubble went
about from man to man whispering； 〃Jove； isn't she a
pretty gal？〃 and never took his eyes off her except when
the negus came in。
As for Captain Dobbin； he never so much as spoke to
her during the whole evening。 But he and Captain Porter
of the l50th took home Jos to the hotel； who was in a
very maudlin state； and had told his tiger…hunt story with
great effect； both at the mess…table and at the soiree； to
Mrs。 O'Dowd in her turban and bird of paradise。 Having
put the Collector into the hands of his servant； Dobbin
loitered about； smoking his cigar before the inn door。
George had meanwhile very carefully shawled his wife；
and brought her away from Mrs。 O'Dowd's after a general
handshaking from the young officers； who accompanied
her to the fly； and cheered that vehicle as it drove off。 So
Amelia gave Dobbin her little hand as she got out of the
carriage； and rebuked him smilingly for not having taken
any notice of her all night。
The Captain continued that deleterious amusement of
smoking； long after the inn and the street were gone to
bed。 He watched the lights vanish from George's sitting…
room windows； and shine out in the bedroom close at
hand。 It was almost morning when he returned to his own
quarters。 He could hear the cheering from the ships in
the river； where the transports were already taking in
their cargoes preparatory to dropping down the Thames。
CHAPTER XVIII
In Which Amelia Invades the Low Countries
The regiment with its officers was to be transported in
ships provided by His Majesty's government for the
occasion： and in t